I met my husband in the summer of 1995 when he was in New York City on a two-year assignment with Japan Local Government Center and I was an English teacher at Berlitz Language Center, although we didn't begin dating until almost a year later. I thought he was cute, funny, smart, and sensitive. But the the things that I liked best about him were his seriousness and his sincerity. He made it clear from the very beginning that he took our relationship seriously and that he wanted to be with me. We dated then lived together until March 1997 when he had to return to Japan. I followed in May of the same year and spent the next two years going back and forth between the US and Japan on three-month tourist visas until we finally married in September of 1999. We had a big, Japanese-style wedding--we wore both Japanese kimono and Western wedding garb--that was attended by more than 150 guests. My mom, dad, and stepdad flew in from the US for the occassion. For our "honeymoon" the five of us spent four days touring Osaka, Kyoto, and Nara. It was a lot of fun. In December of 2000, our daughter, Ahmee Isabella was born. At this writing, Ahmee is 16 months old and a very active, walking and talking nursing toddler. We will be raising her to be English/Japanese bilingual and US/Japanese bicultural.

My Pregnancy and Ahmee's Birth

We started trying to conceive in February 2000 and finally succeeded after three months of trying. I conceived in April and at my first prenatal appointment the doctor gave me an estimated due date of January 10th, 2001. But this would prove to be not quite the case.

At the time I got pregnant I was still teaching English at a local elementary school and getting up early three mornings a week to go in to work. I fully expected to continue teaching until shortly before my due date but things didnt work out that way. From about the fifth week on I suffered from terrible morning sickness and it was difficult to keep up with even my part-time schedule at the school. Teaching first-graders is a lot like being a circus performer. There's lots of jumping and running around the classroom involved and I just couldn't do it. The school found another teacher and I was let go. It turned out to be the best thing. My morning sickness subsided a little but never went away entirely and I was still waking up terribly ill every morning right up until the end of my pregnancy. In fact, my morning sickness was more like all day sickness. Even when I was not feeling unwell I could not think of any food that appealed to me or that didn't just plain make me sick. It was a struggle to eat enough on many days.

The only upside was that I enjoyed a very gradual and moderate weight gain that the doctor was very pleased about. I worried it wasn't nearly enough but the doctor told me that recommended weight gains during pregnancy were considerably lower in Japan than in the US. Aside from the morning sickness my pregnancy was largely uneventful up until the sixth or seventh month. Some time during the sixth month the doctor became slightly concerned that the baby was still in the breech position and gave me some special exercises to do at night before going to sleep. I was to get down on all fours then lean forward until my chest was flat on the bed and stay like that--with my butt up in the air--for twenty minutes every night before going to sleep. Then I was to sleep only on my right side. This would help to correct the baby's position. Well, I started worrying that the baby would remain breech and I would have to have a C-section so I started reading up and found a bunch of other techniques to help correct the baby's position. I'm laughing a little now as I write this but I actually played music for the baby. I put a CD in my Walkman and stuck the headphones at the base of my tummy and played Classical music full blast to get her to rotate her body around and get her head in the right place. I don't know if either technique worked but at my next appointment the doctor checked the ultrasound and said that the baby was now head down. I was very relieved.

The next month of the pregnancy was also uneventful. I was however keeping really busy. I was attended maternity aerobics classes twice a week and was hard at work getting the whole house in order. I didn't realize it at the time but I was overdoing things quite badly. I was also "nesting" although I didn't know it. I was obsessed with all the things that I was convinced needed to be cleaned up before I could have the baby. Everyday there was a new project for me to do and I couldn't rest or concentrate on anything else until it was done. In fact, I couldn't concentrate on anything else even after it was done because my mind was already working overtime trying to figure out what the next project was going to be. I often wonder what my husband must have thought in those days when he would come home everyday and find things sometimes completely changed about. More than just going into cleaning frenzies at home I was also taking frequent trips into town to go shopping for things I needed. I didn't have a car then so it meant a bus ride and lots of walking and schlepping.

By seven months I was already getting big and the weight of my stomach was more than I could comfortably carry around. With every step I took I could feel the pressure on my stomach. After walking less than fifty yards I would feel the need to sit down. At my seven-and-a-half month check up the doctor told me my cervix was starting to ripen and I would have to take it easy. I was to avoid climbing stairs and carrying any heavy objects.

I'm afraid I didn't follow his instructions as well as I should have and a couple weeks later (at 33 weeks along) I woke up in the middle of the night having strong but painless contractions. The following day I was admitted to the hospital for what would be a two-and-a-half week stay. I was to be spend the whole time in bed hooked up to an IV. The good news is that the IV worked and my contractions were soon under control. As bad as two and a half weeks of enforced bedrest may sound it was actually really great for me. It was the first time I was really able to relax and rest. At home, my mind was constantly humming with things to do so I couldn't barely sit still for five minutes. I would try to read or watch a movie but I'd be up again in a few minutes. It was awful. In the hospital, forced to stay in bed and away from the house, I was really able to think about other things. I was finally able to read all the books I wanted to read. I think I read about six or seven books while I was in the hospital. I didn't do anything but sleep and read all day. If the food had been better and I hadn't been terribly sick I would have enjoyed it even more. The only other downside was that by the time I checked out my leg muscles were so weak from lack of use that I practically had to crawl up the stairs to the front porch. In fact, I was crawling up the stairs for a couple days after I got back home. Being as big as a whale didn't help much either.

I returned home when I was in the thirty-fifth week and the doctor gave me a week's worth of medicine to control the contractions. After thiry-six weeks the baby would be full term (or close enough) and we would wait for the labor to begin naturally. When that week's worth of pills ran out I went back to the doctor for another checkup and he gave me another four-day's worth and I went back home. The next morning was a Sunday and I woke up early. A few moments later my water broke. That was at eight a.m. By nine a.m. we were in the hospital labor and delivery room. Over the next twelve-and-a half hours my labor progressed very steadily and gradually and by five-thirty my heavy labor had begun. By seven I was fully dilated and the doctor told me to begin pushing. This is where things slowed down a little. My contractions were not strong enough and I was given a pitocin drip to strengthen them.

Finally, two hours later, Ahmee Isabella was born. She was 2820 grams and 49 cm long and absolutely beautiful. A few days later we were happily nursing well and ready to go home.